It has been more than three months. My brief interlude with you yesterday resulted in pain and I am sorry to say I wont be able to meet you again for some time. When I say ‘some time’, I refer to a couple of months at least. You have been my best buddy and I miss you very much. Each time I see someone powering down in their sports gear, I am reminded of your presence. During these past months, I felt lost and have tried looking for other substitutes.
My closest pal for more than two decades. The one whom I go to when I am down, the one who gives me motivation and pushes me to persevere. There is an empty place in my heart whom no one else can replace. I meet up with Swimming more often than before these days in my free time when I would have spent them with you. It’s different. Where we always catch up in open spaces and nature, my exchanges with Swimming takes place in an enclosed area with many others. I have to share a spot with the others and ensure no collision. Where we used to explore distances, now I have to cover the same length of 25m continuously for an hour. Even though I have employed three different techniques to vary my experience, but basically it’s the same 25metres.
Yesterday when I had you for that short hour, I felt free and relaxed. Trotting down the path at the slowest possible pace, I wanted to build a new start with you again without the hurt. We began fine till we hit the hard concrete. The patience and endurance I have exercised in the past months to recover myself and re-establish a relationship with you – seemed to have ended in a standstill. I didn’t want to cause further harm to what we could have in the future. So I stopped.
Although I am not sure when I will be ready for you again, I have hopes that we will be together again. Sometime but not so soon. No worries, you will still hold a place in my heart. I will keep you close to my heart till the moment arrives.
I love you.